I'm losing my mind!!!

Do you ever feel like you can't handle another thing on your plate? Like, if the phone rings, you're going to explode? That's how I feel right now. I don't want to talk to anyone, hear anything, or solve any problems for anyone. I just need to do my homework and get some housework done. I know being a mom comes first but I'm about to lose my freaking head trying to get these kids to get along and do what they are supposed to do. AAAAGGGGGHHHH!!!

New beginning

I start my new job today! Kindergarten......I can't wait!!

Random thoughts...

So the thing with my sister will get worked out. My husband talked to her last weekend and told her that she and I needed to talk before I'd move past what she said. At this point, I'm over it. I just want to move on.

The past few days have been busy with my youngest son's birthday party, lots and lots of work at my mom's house, and getting ready for finals. I'll be done with school next week and getting ready to start my new job. I can't wait! I'm so looking forward to the kids going back to school and getting back to a routine. I took the boys clothes shopping today. Just need to get new shoes, underwear and socks and definitely a haircut. They look like scrubs!

On another note, I'm starting to question this whole blog thing. I don't think anyone (except Supermom!) reads it and I never go back and read through it like a diary. I'm not sure why I even do it because it kind of stresses me out when i don't get to it. I think I just need to do it for myself and not worry if anyone looks at it (although i'd love a comment or two)!

Crazy Family

A little over a month ago, I had a huge blowout fight with my sister. To give you a little background, she's a lunatic and everyone in the family cowers to her to keep her happy and therefore, quiet. SOOOO not my personality. The reason for the fight was that my 7 year old hit her 9 year old. I didn't scream and punish mine because she was acting obnoxious and frankly, she deserved a good whack. My sister ran after my son, threatening me that she was going to hit him next time he lays a hand on her daughter and that I need to learn how to discipline my child. This comes from a single mom, that has men in and out of her house all of the time and doesn't pay a lick of attention to the needs of her child. Not bragging, but I pride myself on being a good mom. My family and the needs of my kids come first.

Anyways, tonight I asked my brother and his fiance to dinner at my house. I then called my mom to see if she wanted to join us. She asked me if I was asking my sister and I said no. We haven't resolved everything yet and I don't want to be walking on eggshells in my own house. I think that's fair enough. So, mom cancelled dinner plans, brother called and said get over it, and I'm pissed because the rest of the family expects everyone to bend to her will and make sure that she's happy. Mom said she doesn't want to hurt her feelings by coming over here and my sister is not invited but what about my feelings? I hate living this close to family sometimes.

Super Busy

I'm not sure what I was thinking but I signed up for 12 credit hours this summer. I am getting my butt kicked. I'm taking a computer course, Spanish II, and Biology II. Don't ask me why. My head has been spinning for the past 2 weeks and will be for 3 more.

I will be changing jobs mid-August and while my current job knows that I am leaving, the new job called and wants me to go to a workshop before i leave my current job. Although I am not happy right now with my current job, I don't like screwing people over and leaving them without proper coverage. I feel like I am between a rock and a hard place because the new job is MUCH better of an opportunity, twice as much money, and has SO much potential. I'm just torn. Guess this is adding to my head spinning!

On a good note, my mom is finally starting to clean her house out. Since my dad died, she has been sitting on a bunch of stuff, feeling like she's paralyzed. Last week, she cleaned out all of the closets upstairs, is having it repainted and recarpeted. She's going to have a massive garage sale pretty soon. I'm hoping that she'll want to move to a smaller house sometime in the next few years. She has a 3000 sq. ft. house and lives in one bedroom downstairs. I think she may only go upstairs once a month at the most. I'd love to see her buy something smaller and newer so she has less to worry about!

Good Old Days

My mom called me tonight to come and pick up some boxes of stuff that she cleaned out of my closet. There were old photo albums, keepsakes, journals and the most interesting was a box of letters from my old boyfriend. We dated for 4 years (all through high school) and now that i look back at it, our relationship was pretty crappy. The letters were just a peek into the past that gave me a little chuckle and made me thankful for what I have today. I enjoyed looking through all of it and was especially thankful that my husband thought that it was funny. Wasn't at all threatened, (even though old boyfriend lives 2 miles from me) and that's what I like about him. He know's he's got me.

A month...

....has gone by! This summer is moving right along. I can't believe how quickly it goes. We've been enjoying the summer with a weekend trip to the Bay, a day trip to the zoo, a ride on the Texas State Railroad, we're going to Austin next week and we'll be going to New Orleans soon to see family. When I'm not working, I'd rather be on the road with the boys, seeing the sights.

On a sad note, today is the year anniversary of my dad's death. We'll be going to my mom's tonight for dinner. She's cooking his favorite meal and we're going to enjoy the evening together. That's the way he'd want it. I miss him!